October 31, 2014

May 1990 - The Cindy Singleton Collection

From Cindy Singleton this excerpt after cleaning out her desk during her last week at the Tarrant County D.A.'s office.

Judge: Is the defendant known by any other name?

Defense: Do you have an a.k.a?

Defendant: Hell Lady, I don't even have a car!

October 30, 2014

April 1991 - Did I Really Hear That?

Tom Whitlock of Denton contributes this trial excerpt from "a mental health probable cause hearing in which he represented the proposed patient." Tom is cross-examining the mother of his client:

Q.Has she ever [acted suicidal] or threatened to hurt anyone else?

A. No.

Q. I believe you testified that she had some kind of psychosis. What kind?

A. Post-mortem psychosis.

Q. Post-mortem psychosis.

A. Yes.

Tom adds: "I know that dying always makes me psychotic!"

October 29, 2014

May 1999 - Those Jurors

From Judge Alvin G. Khoury of Longview (124th District Court), these answers by two different jurors to the same question in a juror questionnaire he used in a recent capital murder trial.

35. What is the highest grade you completed in school?

A: 100

36. What is the highest grade you completed in school?

A: A

October 28, 2014

December 1986 - Did I Really Hear That?

Q. What is your name?

A. Ernestine McDowell.

Q. And what is your marital status?

A. Fair.

October 27, 2014

December 1990 - Did I Really Say That?

This deposition excerpt comes from Steven W. Harris of Austin (Clark, Thomas, etc.): he explains that the deposition - in a real estate contract case, "involving a piece of property ... which [my clients] attempted to sell to Whataburger - was being taken by Diane Henson, a very fine attorney and partner in Graves, Dougherty" (and a self-described "hamburger helper").

Q. All right. Now, according to Harris' answer to interrogatories, and the ones I'm reading from are from Mr. David Whopperman - Wupperman. I'm sorry. I think I got whopper in there. I'm getting these hamburgers all mixed up.

Mr. Harris: We'll have it your way, Diane.