April 27, 2015

February 1996 - Did They Say That?

From James V. Roberts of Dallas (Mankoff, Hill, etc.), this paragraph he discovered in a proposed contract drafted by the "other attorney":

"Notwithstanding anything to the contrary contained in this agreement, the covenants, warranties, releases, and agreements made in this agreement shall survive the execution and delivery of this agreement."

April 24, 2015

September 2002 - Did They Really Say That?

From County Judge Ken Andrews of Graham, this marvelous exchange that took place "during a teen court trial."

Defense Attorney: Why didn't you have insurance on your car?

Defendant: Because I didn't have a driver's license.

April 23, 2015

December 1987 - Did I Really Say That?

Judge Buddie J. Hahn of Orange (260th District Court) sends this excerpt from "a murder trial that recently took place in my court."

During Voir Dire:

D.A.: Has anyone served on a criminal jury before?

(One juror raised his hand)

D.A.: Without telling me whether you found the person guilty or innocent, what was your verdict.

April 22, 2015

March 1987 - At the Harris County Court House

Q. The truth of the matter is that you are not an unbiased, objective witness, are you? Because you, too, were shot in the fracas.

A. No sir! I was not. I was shot midway between the fracas and the naval.

April 21, 2015

May 1989 - Did I Really Hear That?

Q. Did he pick the dog up by the ears?

A. No.

Q. What was he doing with the dog's ears?

A. Picking them up in the air.

Q. Where was the dog at this time?

A. Attached to the ears.